**I wrote this post last week and promptly left it in my draft folders whilst having a little break away. I haven't done a lot of writing about motherhood or documented much of babies first year, but I wanted to mark the occasion of her being in the world a whole twelve months**
The first year after having a baby is full of magic and wonder but also an incredibly challenging and tiring time. Even having done this all before, just how tough things would be at times, caught me off guard. Even when I struggled for time and energy there were some extraordinary moments with my beautiful baby, she is such a pleasure to have around and she has slotted right in to family life like she was always meant to be.
I had a tough birth with her brother, nothing really went to plan. I wanted a home birth and ended up being blue lighted in to hospital in the bumpiest ambulance ever. This time around I was considered too high risk for a home birth from the get go, so I let go of that idea and focused on having the best birth I could in hospital. I did plenty of hypnobirthing preparation and had to work through some of the emotions related to my previous birth, there were plenty of tears and fear.
When it came to the time I was booked to be induced, the consultant didn't want her to get too big or stay in too long due to the gestational diabetes I was diagnosed with in week 28 of pregnancy. Luckily for me things were already moving along naturally, so although they gave me all the usual medication to speed things along my body was already doing exactly what it needed to. The birth itself was a breeze compared to number one, I had a little gas and air at the end but it was speedy, so speedy in fact I think it caught the midwife a little off guard.
Recovery was a lot better this time too, but I will admit it is never really as easy for me as I would like. As I had such a difficult time previously we planned for Mr Green to be at home for as long as possible to help with school runs for her older brother. This really gave me a chance to focus on breastfeeding and bonding with baby green, which I am so grateful for, I felt very supported and taken care of, I really am lucky.
Baby Green is pretty easy going, she loves to be out and about and took to weaning well. She is more of a grazer than her brother preferring to eat little and often. Twelve months in and Breastfeeding is still going strong, I feel so happy to have the experience of breastfeeding past six months, things change so much in that time, she is currently practicing for the breastfeeding Olympics with her acrobatics but I know she feels very comforted by being close to me. She mostly sleeps through the night or wakes for one feed now, but that can change any time and I don't take it for granted. The second time around I stopped listening to what I "should" do and instead parent with my instincts much more, we do what works for us and what makes us happy and she loves to drift off to sleep in our arms listening to music. I know everyone has their own ideas about sleep and children but I hate the thought of bedtime becoming a battle rather than a peaceful time.
She is getting more mobile by the day, she crawls at speed, cruises the furniture and I know it is only a matter of time before she is walking and won't be a baby anymore. Aside from nap time when I work, I try and focus purely on her throughout the day, I do feel stretched and I always have a very long to do list but I know this isn't forever and that I will miss this time when she is older. She babbles and chats and has one proper word which is "go", if you say ready, steady she will shout it with glee! She loves her toys and is at the stage where unpacking everything is much more fun than actually playing. We go to music class every week and she loves the musical instruments, give the girl a maraca and she is in heaven. She has a wonderful relationship with her big brother, who plays with her and takes care of her. I was a little worried the age gap would be too big, but if I am honest I find that to be a plus and they clearly adore each other.
I feel very pleased that I managed to continue freelancing and writing the blog during this year, I couldn't always do as much as I would like and I definitely was far from perfect, but this was something that I kept that was just for me. I am not entirely sure what the future holds, for now I will continue to enjoy being able to be home with her and watch her develop. Happy Birthday my beautiful girl, we love having you in our life.